Wednesday, 11 November 2015

Mother, what have you been prioritizing? – Part 2


Hi darlings, how are you? In order to understand this post you must read the previous one, as this is a sequel.

Going back a little in history, when I received that news I lost the grounded, after all what I prioritized in my life revolved around the dream of motherhood, how would I not see it coming true?

The pain was unbearable month after month, time passed and the pain for something that did not yet exist was becoming bigger.

I just wanted to hear a little word but that made all the difference, "positive."

Yeah but I did not imagine what I would have to go through and learn until this little word was real in my life.

In an unconscious way I was making that my god. See, we often think that idolatry is worship images, but no!!

Idolatry is anything that we put in front of God, may be a child, a husband, a boyfriend, it could be any number of things.

And I was making of that dream my whole life, it seemed like everything revolved around it, and without it nothing made sense.

Hence why God allowed it and take me to the desert, after all I only depended on Him so that my dream would come true, but I had to give up those feelings.

I confess it cost me very much! And I am sorry it took me so long to understand it, but my beloved God had a much bigger dream for me.

I put all my expectations and nothing corresponded to the long-awaited dream, I reached the point where the pain was so intense that I could not even pass by a baby clothing store, I would be paralyzed looking at those tiny outfits, that has become an obsession, it was not healthy and I was not coping.

The months passed, the years, a total of 14 years!! But in these these fourteen years I learned lessons and experiences for my life that I keep to this day.

It was many years in the wilderness and there I learned, I let it shape me; there I had to be alone with God. Stop talking and just listen.

And when I was taken to this desert, it took me long to understand what God was asking of me, or rather I did not want to surrender, how foolish is not it? Who are we to fight against God, and since when ever did we lose if we are with Him?

As I said in the previous post, I left the desert with no children but totally transfigured.

After this desert I lived the best years of my life,  I still didn’t have children for about 5 years after the desert, the dream continued, but I had learned what He wanted to teach me. Until one day I decided not to charge more that inside me, after all it was always something that would not let me be 100% happy! And I did not need a child to be fully realized, I only had to be one with Him, that's what would make me the most accomplished woman in the world.

God was working in me, because he had great things to my life. The day came that I understood and accepted what had to be done. God asked it of me, was when one day I went to the altar, and there alone with God I tore my soul and was well aware of that prayer! "God, whether or not you give me children, my love for You is not subject to benefits, I can live with no children, but without you I cannot go on. So I decide to put this dream of many years on the Altar and let your will be done, not mine, because only the Lord knows what's best for me...”

I left that place completely free!! I did not know what he would do, but I was sure He was going to do the best because God’s specialty is always doing the best, and in His own time.

My attitudes and reactions have changed, I was no longer a slave of that dream, and felt no pain, God had healed completely.

I still wanted it, but did not live for that, neither did I limit myself because the dream did not come true.

I put my all into serving God, whereas before the devil accused me, how I would serve God if I myself was not answered? See how the devil works? When is the exact opposite, I have not seen what I wanted? There I will serve harder, after all it is written that is giving that we receive, but how much of the time the devil limits us with such thoughts and feelings. Mothers, you that have not been answered, do not despair, God's plans are much higher than ours. Serve! Give yourself as never before! And God will use you as never before!!! I made myself available and in a little while God worked in my life, I was raised as an assistant in June 2009 and in October 2009 I got pregnant!!! And my son was born in June 2010. That same month I was called to serve our God. This is glorious!

You don’t necessarily need to be an assistant to serve God, in my case I had this calling, but to serve God is to do His will, to save souls from hell, and if you like me have this calling go ahead and win souls as never, even if the circumstances are still adverse. Things need not be favorable for me to make myself available.

Mother, make this heartfelt prayer at the Altar, perhaps that is what is missing from you, a true surrender, because when we give in fact, there is a confidence and an inexplicable peace, nothing and no one steals it from us.

And this goes for every area of ​​our lives, which we are putting in front of God.

Today I am the mother of a 5 year old boy, I share this miracle of God and that God is perfect, because our son came at the best time of our lives for us to enjoy him to the fullest.

As I promised I share with all of you our photo. God makes it real in His time and according to His will.

Thank you my dear God, because greater than the joy of being a mother, the Lord revealed Himself to me in a big way and taught me to loves Him like I never loved nor will ever love someone. All this only came true in my life because first the Lord was generated in me from the inside out. I love You my Father, and I am grateful to You all my life, and as much as I give to the You,  it will never be anything compared to what You have done for me, words cannot express my love and gratitude for You Lord.

Mother! It is always worth it prioritizing God!

If this helped you leave here your comments, and enjoy the photos.

Sweet kisses.
Catia Rubim


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