Tuesday, 29 November 2011

Christian Dating Series 12- He’s younger

I’ve been married for 2 years. He’s 10 years younger than me. We had a crisis and thank God we overcame it. I am very jealous and insecure. Maybe it’s due to our age difference. He’s never given me a reason to doubt him, I admit that I am the problem, I’ve spoken to him about this several times, but I can’t seem to control myself when I see a younger co-worker talking to him, I feel ugly, and I become afraid, I fantasize that they have something going on behind my back. Currently, I am about to explode with jealousy as he has a new friend, she’s beautiful and younger than I am. What can I do? I can’t control myself.”

Every time we talk about the subject of age, it isn’t to imply anything; we simply want to avoid problems such as these.

When the man is younger than the woman there isn’t maturity compatibility between both partners and this causes various problems, since one will want one thing and the other another, their necessities will differ, and that’s normal since we go through different stages in our lives with each age.

So when the woman has already gone through her stage of wanting to go out, for example to go out and have fun, hang out with friends, she’ll now have to put up with this stage in her husbands life, and if she is older she’ll now be in another stage in her life. Other things will call her attention, she’ll begin to have a more settled down life style. And here begin the arguments. This is just an example; it can be many other things, such as future family decisions, finances, priorities, and even small day-to-day things.

Let’s not even mention the fact that women already have the tendency to overpower, and want to be in control always, if the man is younger than she will even more feel the necessity to control since he doesn’t have the maturity she does and she will find herself “obligated” to take initiative to make decisions due to his childish ways, and since certain actions require immediate action. Here even more problems will arise, since the man won’t accept to give the woman the control of decision-making.

When the woman is much older than the man, she will consequently be insecure and jealous, we can see it in the above comment and she herself recognizes it.

Let’s avoid this type of suffering, choose someone who will be compatible with your age, because what good is it to get married that way and live in fear, insecure and without trust, I don’t think it’s worth it. Do you?


Anonymous said...

I have always linked older women younger man with some sort of desparation on the female part. Most of the time it does not work unless reasonable age difference of a year or two.


mariteszuleta said...

Thank you Mrs.Tania,
Very helpful message!

Anonymous said...

What if the person you like is 1 year younger. Is that still ok?

Noluthando said...

This very helpful Mrs Tania
That when my time comes i should choose someone who will be compatible with my age so that we can avoid many problems in our relationship

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