The art of Silence

Silence is a vivifying moment of grace, in which the creature is silent, but the spirit speaks.

To be silent about yourself IS HUMILITY.

To be silent over the faults of others IS CHARITY.

To be silent when we're suffering IS HEROISM.

To be silent before someone else’s suffering is COWARDY.

To be silent before injustice IS WEAKNESS.

To be silent when someone is talking IS DELICACY.

To be silent when someone expects a word, IS OMISSION.

To be silent and not speak useless words IS PENANCE.

To be silent when there's no need to talk, IS PRUDENCE.

To be silent when God speaks to our heart is SILENCE.

To be silent before the mystery that we don’t understand IS WISDOM.

We need to know the hours we have to keep silent, and the moments we need to talk. Talking is silver and being silent is Gold...

Unknown author

“Therefore, my beloved brothers, let every man be swift to hear, slow to speak, and slow to anger.” James 1:19

I cannot make friends!

Many people find it difficult to make friends; others seem to push other people away by their way of being or acting. See if you have some of the features below that may cause others not to be your friends.

1.     Shyness - If you have difficulty approaching people, and talking to them, then it is difficult to make friends.

2.     Selfishness - A person who thinks only of herself; only wants to receive and never gives, can never be a good friend.

3.     Criticize - To criticizing everything your friends do is very unpleasant, be understanding and do not judge.

4.     Inattentive - When your friends need you most you are never there to help, in reality you just want to share the good times and never make yourself present in difficult times.

5.     Implication - Always making nasty comments that hurt and is out of place.

6.     Annoying - Never agrees with anything, it not cheerful, on the contrary she is always against everything.

7.     Not open to new friends - you just want to have one friend; you close yourself to new friends, and do not let people approach you.

8.     You are very suspicious - maybe because you had a bad experience in the past now you don’t trust anyone, you don’t think any person will offer you a sincere friendship. You simply think that they will use you and then make you suffer.

9.     Indiscretion – By being indiscreet you are not trustworthy, so people do not want to be your friends.

10.  Bad Mood - no one takes pleasure in being around a person who is always grumpy. It is very unpleasant to live with someone who always has a long face and never smiles. Be careful because this kind of behavior drives people away from you.

Many ways of lying

Who never said anything improper or out of place? We all did at least once. This can even be revealed, but to lie is considered a sin before God.

It’s very important to be careful with our tongue. We cannot forget that from our mouth can come out words of life to edify, just like words of death to destruction.

Today I will speak about lie. What many people don’t know is that there are many ways to lie. Let’s see:

Deceive – Many people deceive others for many reasons. Be it for greed, convenience, to hide something improper, or to gain benefits. This brings terrible consequences and shows that we don’t trust in God in the moment of managing the situation.

Half-truths – Which are the same as half-lies, means to not say the truth completely. In other words, to hide or to omit something, not to say things as they really are. This happens a lot when someone wants to apologize for something, and makes believe facts that did not happen exactly the ways she’s saying.

Exaggerate – Many times people try to make a story beautiful to get more attention from the listeners. To exaggerate seems inoffensive but it’s a way of lying. The person decorates the truth to make it seem more credible, however she loses her credibility because she exaggerates and increases it, changing the real facts.

“Lying lips are abomination to the Lord, but those who deal truly are His delight.” Proverbs 12:22

How about you? Have you ever seen yourself in a situation that you used deceive, half-truths, or exaggeration?

Rivalries!

They exist everywhere: in the family, in conjugal and friendly relationships, in the work environment and even in the work of God. This kind of feeling had already risen in Jesus' days and today is not different.

The Lord Jesus had begun His ministry and was baptizing people. Many people repented of their sins and went to Him to take that step of faith. Seeing this, the disciples of John the Baptist were saddened that the people no longer went to be baptized with John, but with the Lord Jesus. So they brought their complaint to their master.

“They came to John and said to him, “Rabbi, He who was with you beyond the Jordan, to whom you bore witness, look, He is baptizing, and everyone is going to Him.” John 3:26

We notice that these disciples were saddened by the success of the ministry of the Lord Jesus. Isn’t it what is happening today? How many people and servants of God get jealous when they see the success of other servants? They get sad because of the blessing of others. In addition to allowing themselves this kind of feelings, they spread it and contaminate others with poisonous comments and full of malice.

But when John heard these words, he rebuked them saying that he was nothing; that he came just to prepare the way for the Savior, and he rejoiced in it.

“You yourselves bear witness of me, that I said, ‘I am not the Christ,’ but ‘I have been sent before Him.’ He who has the bride is the bridegroom. But the friend of the bridegroom, who stands and hears him, rejoices greatly at the bridegroom’s voice. Therefore this joy of mine is fulfilled.” John 3: 28-29

Let's look at two important things: what we speak and what we hear. Whenever we speak carnal things, we show what is inside of us and the possibility of contaminating others is very big. On the other hand we must filter what we hear.  When someone is in the faith, and listens to something that sneakily wants to infiltrate and create division, rivalry, jealousy, envy, etc., she reacts like John. But if she is not in the faith, when listening to negative words, she can be carried away by them and give rise to feelings or attitudes that displease God.

Do not listen nor feed these things because they will surely destroy you.

When you like what God does not like

In every relationship when tastes differ, there is discordance. One of the two will have to be flexible to deny one's own will and satisfy the other. With God it is not different. You may have a desire that God does not approve, but in this case you have to surrender to the will of God and not Him to yours. After all He is God and we must be subject to His norms, if we want to enjoy all the benefits He offers us.

It is hard to understand when a person claims to want to please God but always puts his personal will above God’s. This is flesh and does not come from a broken or submissive spirit to God. For example:

-       You know your way of dressing is not according to God's will, but you like the clothes you wear too much and do not want to let go of them. After all these clothes have brought you some joy. The boys notice you, they whistle when you walk, and that makes you feel beautiful and desired.

-       You date a boy who is an unbeliever, and has a negative influence on your faith, and you have been displeasing God with that relationship. But you love him so much that you cannot bear to be without him.

-       You keep friendships that are going in a totally opposite direction to the one you want to follow, but you continue with them, risking your faith and salvation.

-       You watch things on TV or on the internet that contaminate your faith, but these things are stronger than you.

-       You do wrong things even though you are aware that these things sadden God. But you still enjoy what God does not like! It means that He is not yet the first in your life and that you live outside His will.

When your tastes, desires, and attitudes do not follow the will of God, you must surrender, and get to know Him, so that you have the strength to deny your will and to do His. You need to like what God likes, only then your life will be blessed and protected by Him. Think about whether it has been worth that your will prevails. Remember that for every attitude there is a consequence!

“Therefore submit yourselves to God. Resist the devil, and he will flee from you.” James 4:7

“For the one who sows to his own flesh will from the flesh reap corruption, but the one who sows to the Spirit will from the Spirit reap eternal life.” Galatians 6:8

God is nice!

You may have heard it from someone's mouth, I've heard it several times! These people say that God is nice and so try to “take advantage” of God's goodness and live in indiscipline. They state categorically that they can do what they want, ask for forgiveness, and God for being so kind, merciful, and loving, is willing to forgive. It is true that God is all of these, but do not forget the other attributes of God, righteousness and discipline for example.

If a person having knowledge of God's word, plays around, doesn’t take it seriously, doesn’t have a faith with responsibility, where is she going? Do not forget that everything we sow we shall reap. And God knows when repentance is sincere and when the person intends to sin again. He forgave the prostitute woman but told her: “Go and sin no more.” If she disobeyed the teaching of Jesus and the next day would be in the same situation, about to be stoned, maybe He would not be there and she’d really die. That’s what happens; sin kills, spiritually speaking. Perhaps the devil has used people without fear to give you wrong advices. Or even you for lack of fear has taken wrong decisions. Look at several excuses for the error:

·      “Do it no one is watching.” God and the devil are!

·      “You do not need to be fanatic, God is nice and knows that you are young.” That’s why He left rules to protect you so you don’t suffer; moreover He gave you self-control.

·      “God understands, He knows our needs.” He also made you strong and rational.

·      “Let’s solve this sin among us, no one needs to know. It is God who forgives not men, everything will remain the same.” So you keep doing the work of God without having confessed it; weak with not a minimum condition to help people, and the devil tormenting you.

·      “They are too exaggerated, God is so merciful.” True, but he also knows the intention of your heart and if you give excuses to continue sinning.

Be careful! Living a life without rules you can never receive the Holy Spirit. You can never be used by God and even worse you will never have eternal salvation. So many losses, isn’t it?

I wrote all of this to help you, not to blame you, or condemn you. But for you to open your eyes and get out of this trap of the devil, which is like a spider web that got you and you cannot come out because you taught your brain to always have an excuse for your sin.

One thing is to sin, another quite different is to practice sin.

God bless you and give you strength to be a decided and determined person.

How to value myself?

How many women often compare themselves with others, they are complexed and don’t like themselves? They cannot find themselves beautiful or capable. The thoughts they have about them are always negative, such as:

·      I'm ugly

·      I am fat or too skinny

·      Nobody likes me

·      I cannot do anything well

·      My friends are more beautiful and more popular than me

·      My body is ugly

·      I’m not good enough

·      I don’t know how to express myself

All of these come from a devaluation. You do not know how valuable you are, how much God loves you and how special you are to Him. Indeed your valorization comes from Him. You need to change the way you look at yourself, and this is not achieved changing something in your body or in your exterior. It’s a change that comes from within, it all depends on how your interior is.

How many girls want to draw attention in the wrong way, putting tight and suggestive clothes, pleading with that the boys to pay attention to them? They do not value themselves. They use the wrong strategies and end up attracting the wrong people, who do not like them for who they are but for what they’re willing to offer, which sometimes is a lot; only because they’re needy and to feel that someone is watching them. They give and don’t receive anything. Their self-esteem is just so low that they need to feel accepted.

Or simply because they weren’t able to study or to buy beautiful clothes, they feel complexed and inferior, begging for attention and even accepting abusive friendships and relationships. Just because they need to feel “important” in someone's life, for they don’t consider themselves like that. Because they cannot love themselves they think no one will it. So if they find a person who mistreats them but says he loves them, they accept fearing to be alone.

All of these have only one root: they do not accept themselves, don’t love themselves, cannot see their value so they do not value themselves.

Steps to take to fight against low self-esteem:

·      Stop comparing yourself with other women

·      Enjoy your beauty, your qualities, accept and love yourself

·      Learn to recognize your value and value yourself

·      Stop living by what magazines and TV say

·      Do not accept negative words or offensive that make you feel down

·      Invest in yourself

·      Take care of your appearance, to feel good about yourself without being a slave of fashion and media

·      And especially take care of the inside, to find the balance and know how valuable you are to God

When you’re able to see your value, you’ll never have to beg for love, affection or attention, because knowing your value will make others also recognize how different and special you are.

Do you consider yourself a woman who values herself?

What attitudes have you been taking that shows devaluation?

Do you reject yourself? Why?

How to react to Bullying?

I would like to warn young people about this practice that has led many to suicide. Unfortunately bullying will not end in schools, jobs, the family bosom, etc. We cannot stop it, but we can learn to protect ourselves against attacks or racism from our companions. You must be strong! You must not believe the offenses nor allow this to affect the inside. We are not talking about physical strength, but spiritual, that which comes from God. If you do not seek it, you will always be weak, vulnerable, and insecure; with God you know who you are, and what they say or think about you will not have strength in your life.

Tips on how to behave when suffering Bullying:

·      Do not demonstrate to the abusers that they managed to hurt you and affect you; follow your way. If you demonstrates that it affected you emotionally, they’ll have more satisfaction in doing so.

·      Trust that you are stronger than them, because it is basically like this. You are stronger than what one day they can become.

·      Try to avoid them. Do not tell them ugly things too, you're not like them. It would be to stoop to their level.

·      Always talk to your parents and teachers what is happening, if you see yourself in a dangerous situation inform the authorities.

·      Help others who are going through the same situation. Abusers are people who try to show off. All they want is to draw attention.

·      Do not take seriously anything the abusers say. They are not worthy of your tears! Do not let their words prevent you from reaching your goals!

·      Demonstrates confidence and teach them that their words have no effect on you.

If you suffer virtual bullying, in other words, through social networks:

·      Save each message sent to you, or take a picture, you may need them when he/she is denounced.

·      Never participate, do not answer, stay calm, ignore, you do not need to prove anything to anyone.

·      To prevent virtual bullying never give your password (email, blogs, Facebook, etc.) to no one, not even your best friend. It's for your own good. You can only give your password to people of absolute trust, like your parents.

·      Do not accept as friends on the social networks people who you do not know.

·      If things get really out of control, report to the authorities.

How has been your reaction when someone tries diminishes you? You have two options: accept it or ignore it. If you believe in yourself, nothing that people say negative about you will have any impact.

Do you suffer or have suffered bullying? Share with us what has been your reactions!